Anxiety | Teeny Tiny Thoughts - Thursday

ironic. in my last post i was all about making this blog more about photography. and here i am once again writing a deep lil' text about anxiety.


let me make this clear. i am not diagnosed nor do i believe i have any kind of serious anxiety disorder. but anxiety is something you can clearly struggle with even if you don't have a diagnosis - a thing i had to realise the hard way. you find so many people with worse problems than yours. it's so easy to tell yourself that your problems don't matter because there's always somebody suffering from worse. but if there's one thing i've learned over the past few years it's that part of taking proper care of yourself is being honest with yourself and being able to accept that there is a problem even if it could be worse. 

i've spent a long time telling myself to 'just get over it, others don't have food or suffer from hallucinations that tell them to hurt themselves' and let me tell yah now, it doesn't work. yes, your problems may not be the worst there are. that's great isn't it? still that doesn't mean that there is none.

i'm sure you've all heard about anxiety at this point as it has fortunately become a very much spoken about subject in the last few years - especially on the internet. personally i didn't know of it's existence until about three years ago. and still from then on i always considered it to be one of those issues 'people have' but of course i didn't. not once did it cross my mind that anxiety could possibly be something i would ever struggle with.

now that's not so clear to me anymore. i get very nervous, i get nauseus and incredibly shaky and come near crying a lot before and also during new and unknown social activities and situations, i fear going to a farmacy to go and get a medication that is well needed because there are people i have to talk to and i say no to a lot of things because of the simple fear of it being a trigger for these kinds of feelings. also, i think a lot about whether or not to stand up in class if i want to go throw out my used tissue. sure that's not severe anxiety. i know. still it's an issue.

once upon a time, solange had a moment of empowerment and decided to capture it.

you may ask me, hey solange, what do you think, how bad does anxiety have to be for it to be an issue. the answer is pretty clear to me. as soon as it stops you from doing things it's an issue. for me that's the case. why do i not go out with my friends and have a good time? it's not because they drink and smoke. okay, partly it's that. but that's the smaller part - that's the excuse i use when i'm too lazy explaining that these are situations that are not very much fun for me. because of the hours before when i'm at home worrying my head off about all the things that could and couldn't happen, because of the shaking, the nausea and the incredibly uncomfortable breathing troubles. sounds incredibly dramatic written down like this but for everyone who doesn't know this feeling - it's not fun.

everybody has their own struggles. everybody has a bit of anxiety every once in a while. some get nervous when they have to have big presentations. some get stage fright. others get anxious in tight spaces. there are as many different forms and kinds of anxiety as there are humans. the problem isn't that the anxiety is there. nobody is 100% anxiety-free. we have to remember that.

last but not least; what am i going to do about my anxiety? the answer is, i don't know. i have made small little progresses over the last few months. i try to get out of my comfort zone more often, say yes to things, but only as much as i can handle. it works out just fine for now.




what are you guys' thoughts on anxiety? has anybody got any tips? leave a comment!

y'all are champions, keep that in mind.

be happy, be kind, love yah. solange

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